Cross one off the bucket list, I have officially gone on my first one-on-one date with a Korean man. I didn’t really realize it was a date until we met up though. We had exchanged phone numbers at a bar and had arranged to meet under the pretense that it was a language exchange. He spoke perfect English since he had studied in the States. He had never been on a date with a foreigner before though, and by our conversation, it was quite apparent.
Since all the great Korean dating blogs name their conquests, I’ll nickname this one “Potato Head.”
I don’t pretend to know how Korean couples talk. I don’t know if I misinterpreted things, or if I just bring the crazy out of people, but this date was terrible.
I should have left right when we met up that night. There were two major red flags. First, he greeted me by saying, “I looked right through you because I thought you were Korean!” I really don’t like when people bring up whether I look Korean or not until I get to know them better. Then, when I asked him how I should save his name in my phone, he replied, “Your Korean boyfriend!” Yeah, seriously, should have went home at that point.
Potato Head is a vegetarian, but he picked a chicken hof to have dinner in. First of all, fried chicken and beer for a first date? I’m a casual girl, sure, but at least try to impress me, please. Second, do you know what a vegetarian can eat at a chicken hof? Potatoes, or fries. Which I don’t like. And, he said he didn’t want me to eat meat in front of him, so basically, I just sipped my beer while he chowed down on fries.
Our conversation was so ridiculous, I almost didn’t believe it was happening. He just talked on and on. I didn’t know how to respond, so I just nodded in disbelief most times, and shook my head when necessary.
Some gems from the evening:
“You have very sexy eyes but cute behavior. I think that is a good combination.”
“I think your eyes are telling me that your mouth wants to be on me.”
“Please be more comfortable with me and call me all the time.”
“Oh, you live alone? Can I spend the night now?”
“I can give you a massage, but you have to buy oil. And you can only wear your panties. Nothing but panties.”
“It would be good if we were a couple because you live very close to my favorite bar.”
“You speak really great English!”
In the middle of the date, he left to watch soccer with the restaurant owner. Korea was in a qualifying game, I guess? I’m not sure of the details. Most women would have left at this point, but I wanted to see what further ridiculousness was in store. In hindsight, I should have left.
At this point, he’s buzzed (or drunk?) because he’s had three beers. I am hungry and bored. He points to the bill and says, “Your treat?” He has “forgotten” his wallet. Of course! I literally laugh out loud as I pay the bill.
Then, he asks where I live. I am adamant that there is no way I will allow him to walk me home. After a few words, he admits defeat. He wants to walk me down the block at least. I allow him, which leads to him whining when I won’t let him carry my purse. When I won’t link arms with him, he whines, “Why do you make me the girl? Why don’t you love me yet?”
Oh, Potato Head, I never want to see you again.