"You don't shower everyday?"

Ryan: Did you shower?

Me: Of course I showered!

Ryan: But your hair isn't wet. How did you shower?

Me: Black women don't wash their hair everyday. It's not good for our hair.

Ryan: So you don't shower everyday?

He was genuinely confused. To me, it was pathetic and hilarious all wrapped up in one. I remember wondering how many other conversations I would be able to tolerate like this. This is one of the initial conversations we had as a couple...and one of MANY regarding black hair. However, I know the uniqueness of black hair confuses many others too. For those of you who are still a little lost - Education moment: Due to the texture of black hair, it is not healthy to wash it everyday. And yes, I still shower on a daily basis. ...fast-forward almost 2.5 years, and now Ryan is ASKING for a shower cap for me when we check into a conference hotel, even before I remember. (I guess after enough times of complaining about how some hotel chains assume everyone has the same type of hair, he would like to skip that conversation and just get the cap himself.) The concept of hair 'breaking off', hair oil (What? Doesn't everyone else try to get the oil out of their hair?), and the dire need for my next relaxer are no longer foreign concepts. He sends ME articles on Michelle Obama and the significance of her hair. He is still learning, but the only downside now is that he is the one calling me out on my 'kitchen'!


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